Archive for August 22nd, 2006

Only Allah owns and knows the truth. But what about our struggle to know it, our need or even curiosity. I believe we are meant to be truth seekers otherwise things would have been much easier to comprehend.

Everyone has his/her own truth .. set of beliefs and perceptions built over years and form glass shields/ boundaries, that an outsider can not see. Only the one behind them is obliged to see through or even imprisoned in them.

Getting a feeling every once in a while that something is wrong, or missing and wanting to know the truth no matter what. Can result in one of these two scenarios as I believe :

First one: Having enough strength and courage to head wherever I expect to find another deeper or different kind of truth.. .breaking the shields and then eventually a wider space can be created/revealed to be owned, the cycle continues to get bigger and the boundaries get farther. And though there will always be limitations… a bigger world with a wider, multi angled view will emerge.

Second scenario: the attempt ends when the point comes to cross the line, a feeling of intimidation and captivation inside the glass cell starts to grow. Some negative thoughts about not having the willingness to know anything further, having the arrogance of the needless state to know what others say or what actually is going on. Believing that being sheltered in such a cocoon of thoughts and preset ideas is safe and shouldn’t be contaminated under any circumstances. And in some cases, it’s the advance desperation that I am not strong enough to embrace this truth and defend it.

But this cocoon is not that safe . It’s as if you are closing your eyes, ears, heart and mind, disabling your senses but guess what … a shocking truth can always know its way to that shelter, attack really bad causing the shield to devastate resulting in immersing exposure to what you were always hiding from.

Don’t know if the truth is relative or it’s just everything is ,much more sophisticated than what we think it is.

How do you expect me to tell the truth when nothing can be accurately described or fairly measured?
A plant that I can see as clearly green will never stay as green. The one whom I think is a saint is just a human and may/will make mistakes. A reliable favorite piece of furniture can get broken the next day. My side of the story is never the same as my opponent’s. And much different that the whole story from an eyewitness or outsider’s point of view.

Even my feelings and emotions not just change but are not understandable to even me. so asking a question related to them will give you a different answer every time you ask even if we assume that the answers were going the same direction all the way, still they vary in their extent.

What made me think of all that … well, I just found myself 28 asking so many questions, wondering about many things and I am seeking to take a glimpse of truth.


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