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Archive for March 17th, 2007

What are the criteria for success, how can you say you didn’t fail when you actually aren’t moving.
I am not moving, isn’t that failure? When you accomplish something you should supposedly proceed with the next level.
But what does it mean to do things right and often be thanked or appreciated for them and then nothing else happens. It’s not only about work, it’s about everything …
Is it a trade mill, I am walking and sometimes running and when I look around I find myself at the exact same place.
May be I am the one who doesn’t know how to take things to the next level. May be it’s because I like to be offered things rather than asking for them.
Yes I don’t ask for things but it isn’t out of arrogance, it’s just a decision I took based on a history of disappointments.
I have faith and I will remain thankful to god no matter what. After all may be there are good things that I didn’t have but there are bad things that I didn’t experience either. It’s a package in a way, a balanced timely one.
I still need to learn things and above all, I should be more patient.
Recently I am tending to be reactive, doing things without thinking carefully unlike me and then regret and wonder how can I ever fix it.
May be I should let go a little, should be more flexible and give myself a chance.
May be I should do risky things, may be I should find myself another passion to fill the emptiness in my heart… in my soul. May be I need a push…
Soft, encouraging talks aren’t always the remedy, sometimes you need someone to confront you with your flaws and let you see what others see and never told you about. Shake you harshly to let you open your eyes and realize what is going wrong, leave you to think and may be cry…
There is nothing I know for sure… they are all “MAY BE/s”. I am searching for the steps/levels, bored and tired of the flat corridor and want to get out and see the sun.

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