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Archive for the ‘Message in a Bottle’ Category

“Message in a bottle”, the original name of my blog, my first post and that intriguing idea of an old sad but full of hope practice I am totally fascinated with.
Today I coincidently found this bog and read that post “Blog Remembered”
Didn’t know the someone else has thrown his thoughts and hoped to be discovered and read.

The interesting thing in that particular blog that the comments are not activated, so I wondered… how would he know if someone has seen his message ? … may be the counter, may be he doesn’t want them to be discovered, or he doesn’t believe they will be discovered…

Walked out this morning
Dont believe what I saw
A hundred billion bottles
Washed up on the shoreSeems
Im not alone in being alone
A hundred billion castaways
Looking for a home

Now these words are making sense, seems there are a lot of messages waiting to be discovered.

Note: I don’t know the writer or the owner of that blog, but I am aplologizing if I am

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I have been reading again about the messages in the bottles that were found and the history of this practise.
The majority are sad stories. Most of them were sent by people who really needed to be rescued and they were calling for help.
So what came in my mind … Were they that desperate as they were drowning and tried to send this SOS or They had this hope inside them and faith that made them do that ???

“Just a castaway, an island lost at sea,
Another lonely day, with no one here but me,
More loneliness than any man could bear
Rescue me before I fall into despair,

ohI’ll send an S.O.S. to the world
I hope that someone gets my
Message in a bottle,

A year has passed since I wrote my note
But I should have known this right from the start
Only hope can keep me together
Love can mend your life
but Love can break your heart

Walked out this morning,
don’t believe what I saw
Hundred billion bottles washed up on the shore
Seems I’m not alone in being alone
Hundred billion castaways,
looking for a home”

Message in a bottle lyrics

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Dear …

Two years ago, I had an interview to move to the marketing department, I was asked about my future plans and I said, I don’t think I will still be an employee at a company after ten years, I want to teach… but I am gaining experience and see what is like to be here, hoping that it provides me with a background and insights that makes me a good unconventional teacher that makes learning an experience and a life style not just words ad theories kept for some while and dumped totally after the exams.

And now when I wake up everyday as the alarm rings I can almost hear a sound that says “It’s Groundhog day” remember that movie … days are the same.

Same people, same attitude, same place, I don’t find it any difficult now to predict their reactions or even the conversations as they are repeated ones.

No one has noticed it but this job has been draining, I am not the same, I am de-motivated and I do the tasks because I have to, not because there is any pleasure what so ever in doing them.

There has been another movie that tells a story about a teenage girl who had to work so she pretended to be a grown up and faked her identity. They believed her at a company and hired her and she did a very good job. That’s what I have been doing for five years, except for the fraud part J .

I always feel I am playing a role of an efficient, serious and a hard working employee because deep down I knew it’s not going to last, I considered myself undercover for some research reasons, or to expose myself to a broader environment so that when I get back to where I belong, I don’t feel I missed a thing.

So where do I belong? well … I am responsible but I am very far from being a punctual employee if I was granted the opportunity, BTW I always arrive late at work but just because they view my as a very good employee, they don’t really complain. I am moody I like painting, photography, reading and writing, I love music … used to play piano but not any more.

I also love teaching … all these things I find myself in … if I was to re-plan my life I would rather work as a part-time teacher and leave myself the space to enjoy my hobbies and may be utilize them and start a project of my own that fulfils my fascination for creativity, design interacting with people in a humanistic beneficial way.

My sister and I had the dream of having a book store that offers value as well as quality service to people … make them love and appreciate reading and learning.

I am just a disciplined person who doesn’t permit herself to fail. And for that I missed all these learning experienced that I could have leaned from failing and screwing up, not to mention the pressure to keep things steady or the fear of letting go of the daily stable routine and go and give my dreams a shot.

Hope one day I wake up to find a brand new day.

Your,

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Dear …

Grab a color pallet and a sheet of paper and learn about the colors … learn about life.

There is no absolute RED, BLACK, BLUE or WHITE … there are tones, degrees, mixtures or nuance.

There are degrees for every feeling and thought we came across, and the distinction is not always that significant.

Competition for instance; provides a kind of a motivational power that can push and drive. but watch out … when concentrated or you get carried away with, a new shade starts to come over the original color, and results in a whole new color….JEALOUSY. And the nature of the moving power you used to enjoy turns to be a negative one that holds or destructs.

Love is another example; in itself … it is a very balanced mixture of colors, any dilution or concentration, affects the formula and jeopardize the existence of the one pure color it used to be.

The magic of it ideally comes from the way the fusion of the colors occur, with certain tones and shades that unify and form a whole new solid color.

The intensity of the feelings resembles the gradation of the colors, we need every now and then to step back, pour all the colors on a white sheet and see which colors have faded, which ones we need to reinforce or mitigate. Feel their temperature and alter the necessary adjustments.

I had always this passion for the colors and if I can see and assign a color for a lot of intangibles. so it’s like there is a color code for everything ,,, examples:

Love and Happiness are white
Haltered is Black
Dreams have a light blue base color, and the real one differs according to the dream nature.
Fantasies are pink
Hope and peace are green (they have the same color… may be because peace has always been a hope).
Jealousy is yellow (I know very conventional).
Fury and excitement are red. (may be because of their intensity).
Sadness is dark blue.
Anxiety is orange.

There is a quote I used to love about artists that I do value a lot and I consider painting as a privilege in that sense …

“Every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his own nature into his pictures”.

Yours,

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Dear,

As always I left the car registration renewal task till the very last minute and since I couldn’t take today off, my mother went to have it done for me. So I have a mixed feelings of guilt and gratefulness I feel towards her I have another problem.

My work is located in a remote area and all the employees have their rides.
I am not mean but I am really mad and that’s why I will going to say that; for a long time I used to drive my friend and colleague S to her home EVERYDAY till she got her car.

And even there is a new girl that I discovered by coincidence that she resides near by doesn’t have a car so I drive her too, and I call her everyday to ask if she’s ready to leave or shall I wait.

N once saw me doing that and asked “ do you drive her everyday?” with great astonished and I went like “yeah, she doesn’t have a car “. She replied back “ frankly speaking, I can’t do that…. Sometimes I am just not in a mood to talk and I like to drive alone without saying a word”.

I didn’t like what she said because she didn’t think about the other girl, what she is going to do, didn’t realize that the weather is cold and she can’t walk all the way till she finds a cab.

I won’t be judgmental and call it selfishness, but didn’t it just crossed her mind what the other girl would feel.

Today, I am facing this situation, it has passed 5:30 and I am still in the office.
S is too busy and has been weird since this morning, as she thinks I am going to take her place, weird thinking as if she doesn’t know me AT ALL. and N, I know her opinion about the whole thing.
I am feeling so bad and I just can’t go and ask anyone else, everybody asks for things … what am I afraid of, it can’t get any worse and yet I am still here writing about it.

The thing I hate the most is to let anyone down and what pops in my mind if I am being asked for anything is the fear I might not be able to be of help.
But how ironic, I let me down with this lame shyness and pride.

Your,

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Dear,

Haven’t you ever felt during a conversation that you don’t want it to end or wondered if you could stop the time for a while so you can keep talking/listening to the person you are having this interesting conversation with? And what is your definition for “Interesting” anyways?

What is the main reason for this phenomenon if I may call it because of its rarity?

Would it be the person, the subject or you?

In other words, Was the person that charismatic… that you were literally enchanted as he knew what language to use or he was empathetic enough to choose what to say, how to address it in a way you can relate to and therefore a kind of connection began to be established and maintained.

Some say, may be it’s the body language or eye contact. but I personally think if sincerity wasn’t there no connection can ever be made based on fake rules or ways.

Yes there are Charismatic people; they know how to communicate with people from different backgrounds, social standards and with different characters.

They can convince you of anything and have this ability to make you do things for them with great passion and motivation not as if you are captivated or hypnotized but with great convincement.

Another hypothesis; the subject …. Every one has favorite subject/s that whenever it’s mentioned, it alerts all your senses and stimulates you mentally.
Another kind of subjects other than the favorite ones… the provocative ones, smart people sometimes need to be challenged and the provocative/controversial subjects triggers their need to prove how smart or knowledgeable they are, sometimes to the people and other times to themselves, it’s like a mind battle.

The last one, YOU … what if you just wanted to have a nice and peaceful conversation with someone you can trust and freely talk to, what if you wanted to be heard, felt and appreciated, what if you were clueless and you wanted to get a mature opinion about something.
Sometimes we are so confused that we want someone to throw all our ideas, thoughts and feelings in front of, and start sorting and reorganizing them over again.

People are of great value and there is a reason for each one of us to be exposed to different situations and experiences. So that if you have the chance to share what you have learned with someone else, have a joint list of the rights and wrongs, it could make a difference to the two of you.

In the end, the answers are so many for the very same questions.

Yours,

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Dear,

“For all life is a dream, and dreams themselves are only dreams”.

I don’t see a reason for any one to lose hope.

Think about the bad times we went through, sad times, agonizing experiences…. where did they go, they were like nightmares we had one night then we woke up and they are gone!

Or even the good times when we laughed and danced when we felt we were on the top of the world, think about success, wonderful people we met, friends we loved, beautiful places we have been to, delightful memories, did they last?

No, they were like nice dreams we had and then we got up smiling and we kept remembering them.

Think about how we used to look when we were young, now we see the pictures and wonder what hasn’t been impacted and changed by the years.

About the illnesses that we or our families had, they are either healed or we decided to live with them and consider that early healthy stage one of the good dreams we had.

Even those people whom we lost, may be we are gonna meet them again and we will look back at our entire lives and wonder what a dream it has been.

Yours,

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